My Cat Likes My Partner More Than Me

Caroline Wittenberg
2 min readNov 25, 2019

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I did the research, I found the Craigslist ad and communicated with the woman who Brahms would be adopted from. I bought him all the toys and treats I could think of, and approached this whole kitten thing with a very much dog owner mentality.

I grew up with dogs all my life and expected to get the kind of reciprocal attention and love that dogs wholeheartedly dole out if you are the one that feeds them, takes them on walks, plays with them, and gives them belly rubs and head scratches.

As it turns out, cats are very different. They are an enigma, one of those large puzzles that has a thousand different blue sky pieces.

And now that I’ve had a cat for a while, it got me thinking; Why are some people dog people and others cat people? I’m beginning to think it comes down to personality, in that it’s not as much the personality of the pet but the personality of the pet owners.

I am a bubbly, energetic, big loving kind of person. I need affirmation from my partner, constant reassurance that I am indeed loved, which is why dogs have always suited me so well. They give me the type of attention and love I need. They greet me at the door, tails wagging and bodies quivering with happiness. They don’t do well on their own, just like I don’t either.

My partner on the other hand is more introverted and quiet. He doesn’t need me to tell him that I love him eight times a day because one will suffice. When he comes home from a long day at work, he would prefer to be left alone until he is ready to interact with his pet. And much like cats, he is an independent creature, perfectly comfortable with his alone time and with silence.

I’m certain our pets pick up on these little personality quirks. Having a pet is like having a weird insight into your own soul and what type of companionship you crave. Which is why I’m certain that when Brahms uses me as a human bridge to reach my partner Joe’s lap as opposed to plopping down on my own, it’s because he speaks the same language as Joe and vice versa. Joe tells me I can’t take it personally and of course he is right. Taking it personally will only throw me into a state of concern that will prompt me to write things like this that deeply overanalyze pet ownership.

Then again, I could also be totally right about all of this and Brahms has indeed chosen his favored owner.

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Caroline Wittenberg
Caroline Wittenberg

Written by Caroline Wittenberg

I’m 31 years old and here is what I know about myself: word enthusiast, dog lover, new-found cat lover, over-committer, and oftentimes, loyal to a fault.

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